Just a note: This here is Jimmy3000, and I was Jimmy3000 long before that jackass Andre3000 was Andre3000, in fact he's as much a 3000 as Buster Rhymes was a 1%er, those were the people who clamed the world would end at the stroke of midnight after December 31,1999 (Him and Prince, and Prince had some kind words for the music industry)

JIMMY3000 HUGE ASS RANT ON THE MUSIC INDUSTRY BEGINS: LOOKIE HERE NOW.

Ah, let us look at the facts of LipsyncyGate, (the biggest Gate since the Janet Jackson’s Malfunction-Boob-Gate that may have added another six weeks to her astoundingly ho-hum career); the recent debacle regarding the fiercely nosed Ashley Simpson.
In her defense we clearly see it was the culmination of:

a) Acid reflux (that somehow went into remission during the other 87 minutes of a 90 minute show)

b) Stupid band that was thrown together for the sheer purpose of supporting a mediocre performer who’s sister can sing “Take mah breaf away” with near pseudo-Berlin- (i.e. pre blonde/raven tipped Teri Nunn not the Bauhaus art movement of the early 20th century) -like perfection

c) Stupid band who’s hair care products outweigh the cost of studio time at Electric Lady (Jimi Hendrix’s former Electric Ladyland Studio in NYC that does not even have a correct bio on their founder.)

unt d) The fact that the music industry is all about dropping words like “rootsy”, “urban” and “honest” to describe what the food industry would call “McChee-Z Fries”

Today a performer like KRS-1 can come on stage, say he supports Arab terrorists for killing half of lower New York on a September morning because security at the World Trade Center gave him and his hoodlum friends a suspicious look (i.e.whitey) and somehow in the course of a two and a half minute lift of someone else’s music with his digitally corrected live vocals, while increasing profits by sales of t-shirts, pendants, and 40 openers shaped suspiciously like hollow point 9mm bullet casings for Boogie-Down Productions LLC.
Meanwhile; poor little Ashley Simpson is too stupid to stop “hoe-downing”, and we’re too busy trying to act amazed like this is the biggest thing to happen since we all brought home a copy of John Lennon’s Double Fantasy to find 60 percent of the album was Yoko Ono howling like some performance artist beholden to the Babylonian lord of the flies; Cap’n Pazoozoo Ray Howdy
The popular music of has reached a level of mundane that I have no words for. There are no more guitar gods; today they barely qualify as guitar noodlers. Lyrics of a bygone age somehow are reborn in non denominational atheistic gospel makeover to sell everything from insect repellent to weasel chow or end up in the top 40 radio slot for a few weeks depending on the marketing skills of an Illuminati-like Music Industry.
It’s sad to think that singers and songwriters don’t throw televisions out windows of hotels, (except for that idiot from New Kids who lit his trash can on fire and had to do community service – Rock on dude!) and if you think about it; there was a level of frustration; there was this inspiration that was well…Inspired.
Back in the golden age of rock and roll even drug induced cement heads could say things like “We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl year after year.” or “And if I swallow anything evil, put your fingers down my throat.” or “’That chick don’t wanna’ know, forget her.”
Today the music industry has been given a blank check: Get whoever you want as long as they’re not over 23 and they have plenty of body piercing and/or tattoos and we will supply talent both digitally and canned, we will supply the music from hits twenty years ago and don’t make any rules about what they say as long as it does not offend any non white minorities, or if it does let us know so we can build a marketing campaign around it. If I have to sit through one more remake where some idiot exec shoves a soundtrack to it that includes Beyonce featuring Puff Diddy featuring Lincoln Park singing “She Bop” or some other crappy songs of 25 years ago, because the industry feels it has invested enough money in those markets a quarter century ago and they know that stupid catchy tunes sell and the just cant come up with a new digital media for people to re purchase their entire music catalog from the 60’s and 70’s without having it backfire ala’ a three stooges pie fight, because most kids will never realize that Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton wrote “Ghetto Superstar” long before it got that West Si’ede makeover.
The music industry is the worst thing to happen to music since the Khmer Rouge began cleansing Cambodia of people who wore glasses, knew what a school was or just showed up for what they thought was a friendly game of Yhatzee.
The music industry is truly the evil empire: let’s look at the facts concerning the death of Jimi Hendrix, a case that was reopened by Scotland Yard two years ago, why? It appears the day before Mr. Hendrix’s death he told his producer, a man named Michael Jeffery the he (Hendrix) would no longer be doing business with Jeffery or any of Jeffery’s cohorts Jeffery according to another witness said “You’re a dead tomorrow.” And, true to his word; in less than twenty four hours later Jimi Hendrix was dead of what the medical coroner in St. Mary Abbots Hospital stated was “an open verdict” case, and not “due to barbiturate intoxication resulting in auto asphyxiation from vomiting” (can’t dust for vomit- I know), within three years Jeffery’s was killed in a private jet explosion over the Atlantic Ocean, and in three years of Hendrix’s sold out shows and endless touring he brought in something like $37,000 when it was all said and done.
Scotland Yard ended up closing the case although they could never clearly say why the Ambulance was reported lost for over an hour on their way to a hospital less than a few miles away, or why Monika Danneman (Jimi’s girlfriend at the time.) was told by the doctor on staff that Jimi Hendrix was fine and she would be allowed to see him in a few minutes.
For the record, I don’t believe in UFO’s flown by either Bigfoot, Elvis or Carlos Santana, I am the first one to tell you JFK was shot by one I repeat: ONE very fucked up guy in a book repository building who was trained by the United States Marine Corps as a sharp shooter and although we love a good myth; despite the hours of audio tape available only three shots are ever heard, that and Oliver Stone is a puffy dough faced fucking liar (90% of his Abraham Zapruda film is staged and chroma-keyed to look legitimate) or that I’ve played “Stairway to Heaven” backwards dozens of times and all I think I ever heard was “Chip-chop, charley, bobby, tramp.” And “Ernie! These kids are driving me crazy!”.
Hell; Jim Morrison; fat, dead would-be-Irish-poet, love the guys music but I had friends who told me he was “iced” because he was going to put out an album with Janis Joplin and Mr. Hendrix, guess what? I have that album, It’s Jimi and Mr. Mojo risin’; two of my teenage hero’s that were so unlike Depeche Mode or Duran Duran that I still worship at the altar of the dead Jimbo’s, but this album was god-awful, it was so bad I shudder to recall it as I type, two drunken idiots that made (Adult-Granola-Rockers) Train sound legitimate. Jim Morrision wanted to test the limits of reality and see how much Jack Daniels is required to fill a bathtub, then consume it before 10 AM - Yet, I do believe this whole Hendrix murder thing: The music industry is an impossibly wealthy entity (Many times what the Vatican is holding if they liquidated, and that’s goddamn scary); and it thinks nothing of marketing anger and violence to disenchanted middle class kids under the guise that it shows them what urban life is really like, so they can embrace it, and suddenly think they’ve become a true ghetto thug and some little dick on unnecessarily prescribed medication who felt deprived because his parents would not buy him Grand Theft Auto for him when he was eight can come to school with a fully loaded AK-47 and we go and blame Charlton Heston; How many of these snot nosed kids ever bought a record from “Bright Eyes” Heston?, How many even heard of him. I bought Cyprus-Hill’s “Black Sunday” and (A to the Mutha-fuckin’ K) there’s about 300 references to shooting either a rival gang member, hood, cop, convenience store representative, circus midget or pesky astronaut before track one is 30 seconds into itself. (Okay, yes, where did he get the gun? The NRA needs to address what the fuck is going on too and stop sticking their heads up their asses: but driving a car and not playing Carmegeddon for real or buying a refrigerator and not huffing Freon fall under the sphere of responsibility at some point as well.)
I think if the music industry tell a 19 year old girl who; let’s face it; is only being promoted because her sister is the Angie Dickenson (yes Tom, I am talking about a very obscure YMCA Carnival acquired poster that your Mom took exception to.) of our brave new age of perpetual youth culture/marketing; a 19 year old who is being told by the music industry (and I make a distinction between the music industry and the recording industry, because for those guys to take the shit the music industry is feeding them and make them sound as engineered as well as they are it does take talent.) to “ho-down” and then “blame the band”, saying she has acid reflux, scurvy and projectile diarrhea she’s going to do it, because they can make or break that McChee-Z fry faster then we can get it out of our digestive systems.