Hicksville Man Finds Lifepartner

Ypsilanti, MI (API) -- Hicksville, NY apartment dweller and online dating service 3rd baseman Chris Cassar has found a lifepartner. Mr Cassar recently visited the exclusive getaway destination and brewer's paradise of Ypsilanti. While there, he made a visit to The Arb in neighboring Ann Arbor which is where it is suspected the two met. Little is known of the details of their relationship, but it is believed that the two share an interest in low-maintenance relationships and long visits to the park (The Arb, exclusively). The two were photographed by a park visitor who noted privately: "The short stature and flat head to rest your beer on are positive traits for a mate in most men's eyes." For now it appears that the two will pursue a long-distance relationship and it is guessed that they will see each other again before the end of the Michigan summer scuba diving season.