I don’t think anyone got my “Lord of the Rings.” rant, I did not even get it. I think I was trying to say something about Hollywood turning out the same old shit. “Lord of the Rings.” is to me an album like Jimi Hendrix’s “Electric Ladyland” or Radiohead’s Magnum Opus: “OK Computer”, I can go back to it again and again and find something new, get blown away and it looked like everyone involved enjoyed it, especially Peter Jackson who gets it through the belly on the pirate ship. Jolly good fun for all. Last night I had this bizarre dream I was watching what appeared to be a 1960’s version of “Star Wars” complete with a wiry and helmet-less Darth Vader who looked like Red Grange so obviously I was thinking about it (my April 11^th thing) . Not my best work, not by a long-shot but whatever, I was trying to create an image, take the reader away. It’s weird to go back to old movies, and see terrible remakes that do nothing but add “cool effects” and then hear them talked about in how much money they made at the box office. How much did they spend advertising? Tickets to the original “Star Wars” were a whopping $3.00, last time I went (and I don’t get out much anymore) it was $10.00 clams to go see the god-awful “Human Stain” which from the little I read from Roth’s book was never intended to have Anthony Hopkins or what’s-her-name. Anyway: Great story made better by putting good looking people in the movie where they did not exist in the book.

I think iTunes knows it’s my birthday, it’s been playing a lot of Hendrix on random, and I have a lot in here, not just Hendrix, it seems to like the Beastie Boys and Slayer.

K-Rock radio in Manhattan changed its format, and until I get involved with 20^th century technology and put a CD or MP3 player in my car (I don’t even have an MP1 player! My car is so old the lighter actually says: “Lighter” and not Data Port or something important that I need on the floor of my car with all the Pepsi bottles filled with water, I’m trying to give up the 12-16 servings of soda, and in America a serving is what you can fit in your stomach before people poke you in the stomach and say “Laugh it up Pop-n-fresh!"Anyway, K-Rock came to the conclusion that the Doors, Hendrix, Led Zeppelin and the Police don’t suck as bad as the shit they’ve been forced to play for the past four years if you mix it in, also more importantly: Alice in Chains makes Godsmack sound as gay as a bag of gay skittles, the gay-est candy in mah mouf. (Tom’s coffee weakened bowels shutter in fear when I write like this, and explains why he never returns my calls.)

Man, I had this whole thing on April 19^th and I was going to say it was the day the Revolutionary War stared, the Civil War, Waco Texas, Oklahoma bombing, the day Jesus grew a little moustache and built a go-cart out of wood, but vahhh, Fanook!