Syndicate: The Original game's opening

This one goes out to Jimmy3K

I was going to write a science fiction thing, very much like Arthur C. Clarke's "Childhood's End" but just changing some names and adding a soundtrack by Godsmack it could be the blockbuster movie of the summer.

Anyway the premise of the piece is everyone in the world wakes up with an afro. (Note to self: Change laws of physics to allow everyone to wake up around 7 AM, otherwise all of South Korea will be calling cousins in Minnesota to tell them something is up fifteen hours ahead of time.) no matter what anyone tries to do with their hair it goes back to Afro. Dogs, cats, dolphins, string beans: Afros. Everyone and everything has an afro (Mt. St. Helens has a big ass fro, but not as big as the one the sun has) everyone that is except the President of the United States, who has hair distinctly like John Davidson.

Anyway I say "going to", evidently this e-mail from Moo alerted me to a preemptive afro-ing of the human race.

1. What time is it?

1:51 PM

2. Full name?

James, my middle name is Joseph

3. What are you most afraid of?

Circus clowns & nuclear annihilation (in that order)

4. What is the most recent movie that you've seen in a theatre?

I have no idea, possibly some artsy shit in Huntington with a clown (see #3) at the end who cries while a daisy wilts in his big clown mitts, the Eiffel tower is lit in the distance with the rallying neon proclamation "Vive Jean LePen!"

5. Have you ever seen a ghost?

Yes, on more than one occasion, and I think we have one in the house unless my daughter is running around at 1 AM with my boots on.

6. Where were you born?

GC LI NY; Mutherfucker

7. Ever been to Alaska?

I just went into Brooklyn for the first time last year to see Amiee Mann, and she's Canadian.

8. Ever been toilet papering?

No, and I never joined a fratt.

9. Loved someone so much it made you cry?

Love, like love someone who died or loved as in I wish I had more time to have hot weasel sex with someone who broke up with me? I've loved onion rings so much that they made me cry.

10. Been in a car accident?

Oh yes.

11. Croutons or Bacon bits?

Bits

12. Favorite days of the week?

When Friday night becomes Saturday morning.

13. Favorite restaurant?

Piccolo in Huntington, and this one when I feel like I could eat a petting zoo (and I do)

http://www.churrasqueira.com/

(the no-longer-existing Sweet Lorraine's - A2! When did this happen???))

14. Favorite Flower?

The Feisty Thistle!

15. Favorite sports to watch?

Guided by Voices at the Bowery Ballroom is far more entertaining than the World Series, Wimbledon and the Super Bowl of ass play combined!

16. Favorite Drink?

Water, but with lots of Dewar's in it

17. Favorite ice cream?

Ciao Bella's Chocolate Jalapeño

http://www.ciaobellagelato.com/pr_flavorsrecipes.php

I kid you not.

18. Favorite fast food restaurant?

At one time "Beefalos" in Cold Spring Harbor, but they have been paved over, these are said Onion Rings in # 9

19. What color is your bedroom

I'm not sure, it's badly lit like a porn set, but it smells far better and nobody ever orders a Pizza.

21. Before this one, from whom did you get your last email from?

E-Hip

22. What do you do most often when you are bored?

Fill out these things and answer n008ie questions at Daz

23. Bedtime?

Between 8:30 PM and 5 AM, depending on if my muse sharpens her claws.

24. Who will respond to this e-mail the quickest?

Dave

25. Who is the person you sent this to that is least likely to respond?

Chris

26. Who is the person that you are most curious to see their responses?

As Hip said: all equally the same.

27. Favorite TV shows?

Futurama, the Twilight Zone, I watched the new Battle Star Galactica last week and I was like "Oh Snap!", the Simpsons are still great (but not what they were in the mid 1990's) but I'm tired of the over played South Park and Family Guy, at this point, it's the same joke twelve different ways and more shows show up every week to push an uninteresting envelope.

28. Ford or Chevy? 1969 SS Chevy Camero Convertible or a 2007 Ford Shelby Mustang

29. What are you listening to right now? "Momma Tried" by Merle Haggard, I used to think he was a redneck, now I know he is a talented mother fucking redneck who can write shit so hard that Tru Gangsta shit should be taking notes.

30. What are your favorite colors?

C, M, K and sometimes Y.

31. How many tattoos do you have?

I had Shaggy and Scooby but they came in a box of ice-pops.

32. How many pets do you have?

2 Cats (and possibly a Ghost)

33 What would you like to accomplish before you die?

Enlightenment or at least some type of non secular stoic existentialism: that and how to make the vinegar dressing at Rodizio.

34. How many people are you sending this e-mail to?

None, I'm blogging it.

35. What is your most prized possession?

Hip's practical wisdom which has saved my puhtootee on many, many occasions.

Helvetica, The Film | Typographica

At last, a sign that there are people like me out there making films...

This here boy am good at de uke-lay-lay.

Sea of Demons: Demonio Rojo

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